Historical post about the power of EMDR therapy

The Direct Correlation Between EMDR Therapy and Peace of Mind

Originally written by Coach Rai on February 4, 2018

I’ve been back and forth and back again on whether I should actually publicize this post. I wrote it in amazed excitement and pure unfathomable bliss. As I reread it again I found the words worth while to more than just the confines of my personal journal. I hope this post can provide an alternative perspective or some amount of peace to a troubled heart.

If you know anything about me it’s that I love to smile. I consider myself an optimist, a happy person, a hard-headed woman bound to not let anything bring her down. Despite all that, as you may have gathered from a few previous posts, I’ve had a rather hard time recovering mentally and emotionally from the car accident my mom and I were in December 2016. Yes, you read that right. It’s been over a year and there are still nights I can’t fall asleep for the flashbacks, wake up to nightmares, panic at the sight of a car accident, get anxious at the sound of sirens, and resolve to tears at the recollection of the memory. I’ve been working vigilantly to cope with this event that was tampering with my well-being and peace of mind but to no avail. I read books, blogs, articles, and studies. I journaled and drew. I found ways to pass the time and occupy my mind. I tried talking to close friends or family members. Lord knows I talked to God. I researched options and called a therapist. It all only lasted until another trigger came up.

Then in the perfect timing, just as I’d began to lose hope of ever really getting over this pain, a friend invited me over for dinner. Her husband, a firefighter of 40 years, stopped me in the middle of a detailed and choked up conversation about the accident to tell me about the therapist and procedures he so deeply admires.

EMDR or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy is used as a tactic to get a trauma victim’s memory unstuck. The thing is, we sometimes go through events or have experiences that get stuck in the front part of our brain. It allows us to remember even the most minute details with incredible accuracy despite the time that may have passed since it occurred. This stuck memory causes for an imbalance in serotonin levels that eventually leads to brain damage and serious mental health issues. Out of fear of reaching that point or simply remaining consumed by one single event, I decided to look into this EMDR therapy. I spent all night researching and made a phone call to set up an appointment the very next day.

I had all of my googling of symptoms confirmed. I was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder. I was upset and embarrassed to tell you the truth. Then I learned that PTSD is an injury like a broken arm; one that can be healed. For the first time since December 2016 I was actually starting to believe I might recover from that heart-wrenching event that was stealing so much of my joy and rest.

My first appointment was on Thursday, January 25th. I spent roughly 40 minutes describing the accident, my feelings, and the specific snapshots from that experience that continued to haunt me while the doctor “mapped out our plan”. We spent the remainder of our time doing an EMDR session. That consisted of picturing a moment from the event that caused a physical pain in my chest, tying a color to that image, making the color into numerous little pixels, then erasing the pixels as I followed with my eyes a pen the doctor moved ever so strategically. (Your brain can’t hold onto the stuck memory while your eyes move rapidly – hello successful therapy tactic)! So I continued tying colors to the image and following the pen with my eyes until I struggled to link a color to that specific image and had no physical pain at the thought of that specific moment. Then I covered the image with a blank slate. Piece by piece, pixel by pixel, I eased a blank sheet of paper then a new and much happier image into that space that was previously occupied by such a painful memory. I then tied a truth to the image. What is it I need to learn or accept or acknowledge about this event so that it can become unstuck? “Accidents happen. It is okay that this car accident happened to my mom and I”. So that was it for appointment # 1. I had gone in feeling extremely nervous and a bit suspicious. I left feeling completely astounded.

I spent the remainder of the day feeling emotionally drained but in peace. I slept like a baby that night. I drove to work on snowy roads the next morning. There was a vehicle off the road. I saw an ambulance with sirens blaring the next afternoon. I didn’t panic. I didn’t reach an unmanageable level of anxiety.

I went to appointment # 2 the following Friday. We started the session going over good and bad things, feelings, and changes I’ve noticed since the first meeting. There were far more good changes!

We dove right into another EMDR session from there. By the end of the appointment I was in tears — tears of joy! Chipping away at the stuck memory has quickly lead to some realizations that made me truly grateful and accepting of the cards I’ve been dealt. My mood and perspective improved drastically because my mind isn’t being overran with guilt or fear from the car accident and aftermath of it.

If you’ve found yourself at the end of your rope with no idea what step to take next or you’re embarrassed to be feeling what you’re feeling; I promise you aren’t alone and that you haven’t reached the end of your rope. There isn’t even a rope that you’re holding onto. You’ve got far more stable of a foundation and far too many options. Keep your head up.

If you or someone you know has experienced any sort of trauma that may have gotten a memory stuck, point them to an EMDR therapist. I whole-heartedly believe in this process because it works! Once you get that memory unstuck, it is filed away like any other memory in your brain and you can move on with your life, away from debilitating fear, and onto truly, freely living!

If you or someone you know needs a friend to confide in or a shoulder to cry on, point them to me. I’m rallying against this stigma that it’s unacceptable to express feelings or admit your emotional struggles. All it takes is one person. One person stepped out of the norm, shared his experiences with me, encouraged and supported me, and I’ve made more progress in the past week and a half than I had in the year prior.

Be willing to be vulnerable at the chance of helping or showing compassion to someone. Be willing to bravely reach out for support or assistance. Be willing to take a step out of your comfort zone to resolve whatever issue has come your way, whatever memory has scarred your past, whatever burden has been given to you to bear. Be willing to do what it takes to improve your mood, alter your negative perspective, or be a little more genuinely joyful.

I’m fully confident in your ability to mend whatever it is that’s hurting or broken.

Have a remarkable day friends!